Arnold and Sarge Lively Blazed by Team D-Wright

After months of taunts, trash talking and guarantees, Geef, Santi, Arnold and Sarge took the court for the first annual Memorial Day Slaughter-fest. It was never close.

Team D-Wright came out of the gates swinging, led by Santi's 15 assists, 10 steals and 8 rebounds. Geef took Sarge to the hole all night, blazing him with a fine display of post moves the lefty had never seen before. Geef finished with 15 points, 20 rebounds and 8 steals.

"We never had a chance. I mean, I thought we would at least score a point, but they were too ill." - Sarge (0-32)

The 15-0 first game was even surprising to team D-Wright, who although they knew they would win, did not foresee this masacre.

"I figured since they said we wouldn't score against them they would at least score one point. Honestly, it looked like they had never played before" - Santi

"Well, I've played one-on-one agaisnt Arnold many times and it has always been ugly for him. I thought Sarge would give him a boost...I was wrong." - Geef

Equally as confusing were the pre-game taunts made by the Lively boys. Sarge claimed his opponents would "crawl back to the beach", and Arnold stated that he "wouldn't miss a shot".

"What can I say? Brad's shot was on, he was dominating me on the boards and I couldn't keep him in front of me. We got Blazed." - Sarge

"I don't think those two will ever lose a 2 on 2 match." - Arnold (0-23)

The second game was more of the first, with the Lively's demanding breaks and pleading with the ref to force team D-Wright to play with their off hands. The ref wouldn't budge.

"They were complaining like Iverson out there. I just told them to lose with class." - JTG

Even the Lively parents couldnt belive it.

"Team D-Wright made my boys cry in the car ride home." - Mr. Lively

Alsmost as soon as it was over the Lively boys demanded a rematch. More information will be given on the date of the second massacre.

Team Bald Posts Unprecendented 14-0 Horseshoe Record

"We were blinded by the reflection of their heads" - Dot

In a violent display of brutal HR (horseshoe relations), Geef and JTG effectively renamed Gibson Court with a dizzying array of ringers, leaner's and devastating celebrations.

No team felt the wrath more than Team Glorified Puerto Ricans, who posted a putrid 0-5 record against the Q-Ball kids.

"We feel like the Turks at Thermopylae - bested by a superior race" - Peltz

The massacre began on Saturday and continued into the Sunday hours, with numerous opponents attempting to dethrone the champs. Close as they were, they inevitably all felt the cold sting of defeat.

"I don't understand. We were up 20-1. Before i knew it, Geef had 6 ringers, Jared had 5 leaner's and the next thing I knew they were violently celebrating. They were Gods." - Dugan

Much like the Spartans' victorious battle chants, Team Bald would humiliate slain opponents with celebrations that lasted for minutes, included fakes, high fives and stern hand shakes. The fans were enamored.

"I always knew Team Bald was the best at horseshoes. I never knew they were the ill celebrators" - Mrs. Lively

When asked their secret, Team Bald was right to the point.

"When your ethnicity invents sports, much less civilization, you have an inherent advantage against inferior peoples. It's just history, sons." - Geef

"We felt bad for those Chauncey's. We tried to employ the mercy rule, but asses kept trying to blaze us. Clearly, they were wasted...BWHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!" - JTG

"Oh yeah, i forgot...BWHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA" - Geef

Team bald will put their record on the line in the weeks to come. Any challengers are welcome.

Welcome in that ass...

BWHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA.... Sons, start blazing that ass' blog. That ass' blog is a subsidiary of Believe It Enterprises (BIE), a PR firm I founded in 2000. Currently, there are 15-20 members of BIE and each add their own degree of insanity and overall lunacy. Basically, the BIE structure is as follows...

Leadership
Founder, Spiritual Advisor - "Geef" (aka Tommy Jacobson, Knife, Night Thrasher Papondopoulus)
Chairman of the Board - "The Jew" (aka JTG)
CEO - "Dugan" (aka Doug E. Doug, Gandolf, Doug E. Fresh, Arthur, Dugan Arthur Dugan aka D.A.D)

Partners
"Santi" - Head of IR
"Ace" - Security, head of SR (steak relations), President of Chauncey Inc., a subsidiary of BIE
"Peltz" - Head of SR (Scottish relations), and NBR (Non-butt relations)
"Dot.com" - Head of PR (Potato-head relations) and FR (firecrotch relaions)

Our comany headquarters are located in "illmington" Delaware, the illest city on the eastern seaboard. Currently, we have offices operating in New York, Northern Pittsburgh (Cleveland), and Wilmington. Pictures and bios of current BIE members will be forthcoming, as will name origins, various "fest's" and our violently classified vernacular.

In addition, various information will be posted about our militant armed wing, Thug Relations "TR". These brutes are solely graduates of St. Elizabeth's High School in Wilmington, DE, a school known more for it's wastedness and thuggery than it's competence. Neverthelesss, they are a loyal pack of toothless cohorts who's goal is to punish those idiots who step to BIE, or TR. Sons, we love that ass'.

TR Leadership
"Poop"
"Machine"
"Lincovitch Wolski"
"Jerms" Forrester"

So stay tuned in that ass, cause joints will be blazed in the ill future...